The Old Unicorn (Leeds, West Yorkshire)

The Old Unicorn (Leeds, West Yorkshire)

We didn’t have breakfast this morning, beta offered to buy it for us, so we left early enough to see her for 10am. The morning traffic was non-existent so we arrived early. The wife used Greta to direct us and soon we were outside her house. Something was strange, I was sure that the door used to be white, and I couldn’t remember it having metal bars over it. The wife said that she was sure there used to be grass not concrete.

The wife banged on the door, but nothing happened. We were expecting beta to come running out, thought she might jump on nellie and hug her. But nothing. Was we at the right house? We rang beta and said we were outside, but she said we were not. Then we knew, were were in the wrong street.

Who ever named the area decided it might be fun to have very similar named “Duckford Crescent”, “Duckford Avenue”, “Duckford Deadend”, and we were parallel with the correct street. We moved quickly and went to the correct address.

At last we were in the right place, after a few hugs and stuff, it was time for breakfast. We took a walk and got to ‘Frankie and Benny’ which could not do any cooking due to an extractor fan failure. By the time we walked to MacDonalds they had stopped doing breakfast. So we walked back to the car and drove to the Unicorn.

Beta paid for us to have a great fried breakfast, I took a few photos, which always makes people stare at you (why would someone want to have a picture of the carpet?)

After breakfast we went back to beta’s and chatted a lot, finally early evening came so we went into town and went to the hell hole that is Primark. A shop that makes a jumble sale look organised. There was so many people (Leeds is bigger than Ashford), the girls bought shoes (not really a shock here)

We eat at an Indian restaurant, which was really good. They cooked a huge family naan, which made us feel so stuffed that we skipped desert. As early evening fell we left. Greta took us down the M1 (rather than A1M) so we didn’t even see the OK dinner on the way back. Halfway and the wife asks me if we should “pop in” and see gamma (he lives in Exeter), I said ‘why not’, but we didn’t. Maybe next time.

The traffic was pretty good (as it was late), and we got home just around midnight.

Lovely day, and Nellie is now with her new owner. Let’s hope Beta can pass the test soon.

The Darrington (West Yorkshire)

Delta and gamma have kindly allowed me to pass ownership of Nellie (the C3 desire) to beta. Beta is still learning to drive, so I hope this will give here the inspiration to get passed.

The plan was simple, the wife would drive up in belle (my lovely BMW), and I would follow up in Nellie. Only 240 miles! First I had to get on the insurance, which actually made it cheaper (got £115 back!).
We left work at 4pm and got on our way. Greta was saying it would have 85 minutes of delays, and we hit the first block at the Dartford Crossing, this took a while, then the clear road.

No issues on the drive, we stopped at the OK diner and I ordered a 10oz burger. The wife noticed that the table next to us got a big burger delivered, but it was not for them, they decided this after a lot of prodding and moaning and they sent it back. We kept watch to see if this burger was reused. After a while the waitress told us our meal was taking so long due to a mistake and a new burger was on its way, to say sorry we got a 20% discount.

Can I say waitress any more? Should it be waiting person? Or generic server?

I wanted to book a spoons of course, but the nearest is 20 miles north of Leeds and frankly the wife if getting a bit bored with them (it’s going to make the rest of this blog hard work). So I booked the darrington which is a hungry horse hotel.

It was actually good and well priced. Maybe my blog is for the wrong chain? Should I have done ‘horse race’ rather than wetherforecast?

The shower was very noisy, and you knew when the neighbours were having a wash. I had a quick pint of beer and then to bed.

Tomorrow we drop of Nellie.

x

The Imperial (Exeter, Devon)

Moving Day (Part 2)

​​We started early, we had a slot to move in all our stuff for 10:30 - 11:00. As we didn't know exactly where the flat was, we wanted to find the location first.  It was all to easy, the drive from the hotel to Exeter was strange, really very few cars.  For a moment I was worried that we had arrived in the wrong place or on the wrong day.

We found the flat and had plenty of time, so the plan was always to visit The Imperial again, we loved it last time we went and also we though we could get brinner, and then get to the flat afterwards.  The original plan involved unloading the car and then me returning to use the pub car park and park for free, which of course all went wrong when we found out you have to pay to park here.  

After the food the wife realised that we had forgotten to pack any pillows, so we drove out of town looking for the Sainsbury that we had passed on the way in.  Due to the strange road system, we found Argos instead and got the pillows from there.

After that we went to the flat (location), The area did not have any people and we didn't really know where we were going or what to do.  delta asked someone who was unpacking where they got their key, and then he was off and returned a few minutes later with the key and a young lady (he works fast this one).

We unloaded the stuff, met 2 of his house guests.  Whilst unloading we realised other essentials we didn't have (tin opener, pots and pans, etc.).  The original plan was for us to do a full shop, but instead we walked into the town (which is mainly up hill), and got the essentials we needed.  Wilco's was totally geared for student essentials.  

gamma seemed a bit tired at this point (it was nearly mid day), and seemed ready for us to leave.  So we went back to the car, done many hugs, cried a lot and then, with a heavy heart, the wife and I left.  Did we do the right thing, is he going to be OK.  Time will tell.

The journey home was terrible, just passed stonehenge and the A303 was shut.  It took ages before we got home to an empty house.

x

26 of 50: The White Hart Hotel (Okehampton)

Moving Day (Part 1)

The day we were dreading has finally arrived.  delta is leaving home (and so are gamma and gamma-p for a second time!).  My study is a mess filled with all of gamma's stuff.  All of delta's stuff is packed and is upstairs.  We start the day by moving all of his stuff into the kitchen.  Whilst the wife and gamma go into town for a last 'mum and son' thing, I am left to load the car.  It just about fits in the wife's car (there is no way it would fit into mine).

Help arrives for gamma-p and they take the first load into their car, and leave.

We leave a little latter leaving just gamma all on his own waiting for grumps to come and help him move another car load of stuff.

We left around 12:30 ish, and followed the sat nav all the way.  The M25 was slow as normal, especially around the M3 and M4 junctions.  The sat nav (let's call her 'evil gretta') did not care about the traffic conditions too much, and by the time we got to the M5 we got stuck in a very slow queue.  It seems that there had been a major crash earlier in the day and the road was shut north bound.  Apart from the queue joining this was not a huge problem, and once we got onto the M5 things went well.

T rang us during this phase to make sure we hadn't got caught up in the accident.

Of course it is a long trip from Ashford to Exeter, so it made sense (to me) to add on 20 ish more miles and book the hotel in Okenhampton.  Of all the things that happened today, this was my better decision.  The hotel is actually rather nice, I booked the 'executive suite' and it is great, a nice large bed, plus 2 single beds, a sofa and a TV.  Tea and Biscuits, and all for under £100.  Really great value.  We were all a bit tired by the time we got to the hotel.  

We went downstairs for a meal.  I tried to talk everyone into going for a curry, but after the long day it didn't seem like that we going to work.  We went downstairs and it was very busy, all the tables were full and people were waiting to find a seat.  We sat near the bar and got the view of a pillar, I ordered drinks via the app.

After much waiting and searching we finally got a table near a hen party (which had the largest blow-up Willie I have ever seen).

When I went to order the food, there was a crowd of young people, one of them knocked over their glass and incredibly it bounced on the hard concrete floor, less incredible was his ability to catch the glass on the way back up, and he missed.  It is once of these events that if you were to see him drop it, bounce, and catch it, it would be awesome, but it was not to be.  A loud smash and one less glass.

We all had the same (Empire State Burger), and another drink.  As each meal comes with a drink i ended up having to have 2 more beers (I told R that one was for him, but as he is in Ashford I would have to drink it for him).

We retired back to the room, put on PJ and got ready for bed.  My table lamp had a flexible cable which allowed me to aim it directly in gamma's face, to which he replied "you cock" and proceeded to aim his two lamps at my face.  

And then to sleep....

x

25 of 50: The Picture Playhouse (Bexhill-on-Sea, East Sussex)

The newest ‘spoons in the UK

It’s the bank holiday Monday, it’s actually a hot day.  Gamma is staying with us until his new flat is ready in a few weeks time.  It is also the last day of my holiday, so of course we need to make the most of it.

Originally I didn’t want to go to far away from home, but none of my ideas of places to go were well received, and then the Brain-wave, lets visit the newest ‘spoons in the UK.

We typed in the post code into the sat-nav, and all four of us (me, the wife, gamma and delta) left the house.  Gretta was saying that we have traffic delays of 66mins, my guess was she wanted to go via Rye.  A little way into the trip Doris offered an alternative route with only a 1 minute delay (via Tenterden), this was the way I wanted to go anyway.

I must have switched on the ‘idiot’ magnet by mistake as every slow car in front seemed to let in an even slower one.  I was following a slow van and a slow car, and then the car in front pulled over, without warning or reason and I thought, ‘my lucky day’, so I over took him, only to look in my mirror and see a police car with its sirens going.  Oops! Luckily he was not coming for me, and I let him go past me.  It did give me a chance to jump the white van (he has pulled over for the police, but I followed the police car and overtook him), and with a smug grin I carried on.

In St. Michaels we needed to stop for fuel,  I had been in a good mood up to this point and even peoples slow driving didn’t make me angry, but after filling up we go into the shop where two girls were trying to by cigarettes, but their card was not working.  What to do?  The guy serving thought it would be a good idea to try another 100 bloody times, and finally suggested they leave and use a cash machine.  After them a smaller girl buying enough water to hydrate the Sahara, but paying with enough small chance to weigh down a large camel.  I could feel the heat rising, and it was not the outside temperature.  I returned to the car, after a simple, quick payment, and carried on with the trip. 

After a time we finally arrived at Bexhill-on-Sea.  We drove passed the turning for the pub and headed for the sea front.  I figured we could take a leisurely walk back into the town.  As it was Bank Holiday and as it was very hot, the sea front was very busy.  I finally found a space down a side road but must have been nearly a mile away from the main town.

We arrived at the pub, and from the outside it looked like the best building in the street, of course the old lady outside having a cigarette lowered the tone somewhat.  We found a table near the entrance and then the wife and I went to the bar to order food.  The pub is actually really nice, and for me a new experience was having a new carpet that is in really good condition.

We sat at table 88, which I would advise you to avoid at all costs, as behind us is the collection of condiments, so we had a gaggle of strangers pushing behind the chair to get to them.  

From the website I knew they had an upstairs area, and of course the toilets were upstairs, so we went that way on the way out.  It is really nice up here, and the toilets were very nice and clean.  It is strange that from the gents there is clear glass where you can overlook the tables.

We went back to the sea front.  On the way there, outside of one of shops, was an old freezer (the type that you sell ice cream from), with a sign saying "free" (or words to that effect), delta was trying his hardest to move the damn thing, which a few bystanders found amusing.  It did make us all think of ice cream, so when we got to the sea front I bought everyone some (it was Kelly's of Cornwall), we had not tried this before and we were all very impressed.

We sat on the beech for a while.  gamma wandered off (mainly to take note of the brand of ice cream for future reference), and when he returned he had bought himself another double cone and seemed very pleased with himself.

After a while we decided to leave, there was no parking charge or time limit, which was nice for a change.  

So, that was it, I have reached the half way point of my challenge, and have visited the newest 'spoons in the UK.  Until tomorrow when the new one in Ramsgate opens...

The Thomas Ingoldsby (Canterbury, Kent)

The Canterbury Tales & The First Pint

We had not planned to do a spoons today.  As you know we recently went to see Kinky Boots, we offered to take gamma and gamma-p to see a show.  They wanted to see ‘the play that goes wrong’, but we left it too late.

Plan B was to visit the Canterbury tales.  I had never been before.  On the day gamma-p was not feeling well, so that left the these of us, gamma, the wife and I.  We walked into town from gammas flat, and headed straight to the tales.

There was no queue (perhaps this was a sign?), we payed for the 12:30 slot and waited for a short while in the nice garden area around the back.  This area is good if you have young children, but gamma is too old to enjoy it.

I don’t want to spoil the tales for anyone, but for me it was pretty rubbish, the wife and gamma scored it 6 of out ten, for me it scrapped a 4, and that was only for using innuendo and out dated terms such as ‘nancy’ (I wondered what word the Danish tourist translation would have substituted for this).

Outside the tales is a Fish and chip shop, and given that our last trip to Canterbury did not have fish and chips we decided today was the day, for me this was one of the best bits of the trip and the food was very good.

Gamma needed to get a prescription (we pondered if there is such a thing as postscription), then I felt the need for a drink

The wife suggested to gamma that he might want to buy me a pint of beer.  This has been suggested since his 18th birthday and today it was delivered, (better late than never), of course we went to a spoons.

I got a normal glass for my 1664, but the guy next to us was given the new ‘Nancy’ glass.

Thank you gamma for my beer!

On leaving the pub we heard an old lady turn the corner and shout with, in my view, too much excitement, "oh good, a wetherspoons", It makes me wonder if I have chosen the right topic for my blog as this place seems to be a magnet for loud and annoying people.

Gamma and gamma-p are moving out on Sunday, and will come back home for a short while, we are really looking forward to it.

The County Hotel (Ashford, Kent)

Two People, Midday Drinks and Dessert!

Last week I went to Germany for the company, then I went to Worcester with my dad.  So the wife had been missing me and wanted to spend some time with me.  I am off work this week.

Given that I have driven so much, I really didn’t want to drive anywhere, or even go in the car as a passenger.  So we decided to walk into town as I wanted to buy a few t-shirts.

As you walk into town from our house you need to walk past the County Hotel, or you could go in for a quick drink.  It was not too busy and we sat next to a small group of, let’s call them retired people.  We assumed it would be a nice quiet meal.

If you go to the pub on a Friday night it is often loud with a lot of swearing and innuendo.  You don’t expect to find this at dinner time with a group of old(er) people.  We overheard them talking about gang-bangs and creative things you can do with mastic.  I know all about Rogers health problems, and just some of the things you can do with a large steak (other than eat it).  It did make me wonder if this is what we sound like when we go out with r&t?  Frankly it (nearly) put my off my food!

When you are working most days you so forget that life goes on for other people, every day people going into town, and although they were vulgar, it was good to see older people out and enjoying themselves. 

We left after two drinks and got my t-shirts.  Whilst walking around we got a txt from delta-ff to task it it was ok for a group of friends to come around, so we said “yes” and decided not to rush home.  With little else to do we had to walk back passed the County, or maybe we could go in?

We had two more beers and pudding.  I think it is the first time I have ever had pudding here, but it won’t be the last.

We left, slightly tipsy, and made the long, not straight, walk home.